“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

2 Corinthians 12:9

So here we are trying to navigate our way through toddlerhood! Our daughter is just shy of 15 months and has some VERY big emotions going on. The last couple of days have been tough. My husband and I feel emotionally and physically exhausted as we try to be what she needs the most. Warm, loving and compassionate parents who remain a constant no matter what is thrown our way. And boy, is this one of the most challenging things we have ever had to do!

When our children have continual emotional meltdowns, it is often difficult to keep our cool and focus on their needs. We question our parenting and where we may be going wrong. We ask “what about our needs?” What about OUR own feelings of frustration and helplessness. In these times of confusion and doubt, we must be reminded of the truth. The truth is that this is exactly how God intended it to be. He created children to be inquisitive, to learn and develop specific skills little by little over many years. He designed children to push boundaries and to be completely dependable on their parents ALL OF THE TIME, especially in those first few years. As parents, it is our role to nurture and encourage their learning by extending the same grace that God extends to us, His children.

So what is grace? In simple terms, grace is receiving something we don’t deserve but desperately need. For example, when our daughter is having an emotional meltdown like the one we described earlier, our initial thought may be “would you just stop!” At the time, it seems like a very logical and normal reaction to have, especially when patience is being stretched beyond limits and boundaries are being pushed. But if we sit with this for a few seconds and think about how Jesus would respond to our needs, it would never be in this manner. Jesus would respond to this undeserving circumstance in a loving and calm manner. He would say “I can see that you are struggling. How can I help you with what you are going through?”

Even as our children grow older and gain their independence, parenthood is a marathon and our responsibility will always remain. We are to love them. To nurture them. To guide them. To train them. And this requires ALL of our emotional, mental, spiritual and physical strength. But how do we remain consistent, emotionally available, nurturing and loving day in and day out? Only by the grace of God. By extending the same grace towards our children the way Christ does for us! Because WE ARE ALL His children! By responding to our children with grace we are accepting them as they are. We are saying to them that they matter and that we love them no matter what. And when young children grow up surrounded by the grace of God, it is only natural that they, in turn will want to seek God themselves. And this is ultimately God’s design for all of us.

So does my husband and I always respond gracefully towards our daughter? Certainly not. Are there days when we fall short? Absolutely! But little by little, as we invite Jesus into our daily (at times hourly) lives, extending grace becomes easier. It takes patience. It takes practice. We will always fall short as parents which is why we must be reminded that we are not expected nor should we try to do parenthood in our own strength. God is always with us! Corinthians 12:9 tells us, “His power is made perfect in weakness.” This simply means that when we do fall short, we only need to call unto Jesus and He will always provide us with His grace and His mercy to be exactly who we need to be for our children.

If you are anything like me, I would find myself feeling guilty, in condemnation and feeling like an awful mother. A failure. But God thinks differently! He says to me, “You are equipped.” “You are the fearfully and wonderfully made.” “You are loved.” “You are cherished.” “You are MY child and I will give you strength, grace and wisdom that surpasses all understanding.” If you find yourself stuck in condemnation, I encourage you to invite Jesus into the centre of your life. Every morning as you begin your day, you can say a short prayer:

Thank you Jesus that you are always with me. Thank you that today, you give me the wisdom when I am unsure of what to do. Thank you for your endless grace so I can pour out your love, your compassion and understanding towards our children. Thank you for your mercy when I make mistakes. Most importantly, thank you for our wonderful blessing, our children. For you love them even more than we do.

Parenthood is hard! And yet, God already knew all the challenges you would face. Just call on Him and you will see, the days will become noticeably easier because you will have a peace that surpasses all understanding. You are never alone. Jesus is always with you.